whatever comes to mind…

Posts tagged ‘family’

Nasty Lasty…

This is an old joke but it always brings a smile to my dial:

(Have a great weekend everyone)

Social Security
A retired gentleman went to the social security office to apply for Social Security.The woman behind the counter asked him for his driver’s license to verify his age. He looked in his pockets and realized he had left his wallet at home. He told the woman that he was very sorry but he seemed to have left his wallet at home. “I will have to go home and come back later.” The woman says, “Unbutton your shirt.” So he opens his shirt revealing curly silver hair. She says, “That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me” and she processed his Social Security application.

When he gets home, the man excitedly tells his wife about his experience at the social security office. She says, “You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability too.”

 

Thank you bloggers for theTick-Tock..

Today I have gone through so many different emotions and moods – most of them were caused due to the amount of time I spent reading through other peoples blogs- the rest were caused by the medication which the doctor has put me on for the problem I have in my heart cavity.

Firstly,  the medicine I am taking has had me itching, nauseous, shaky and confused  –  none of which I’d consider a contributing factor to recovery from heart problems.

The blogs that I have read today on the other hand, have been very amusing – some are rather funny, others informative and a few are exactly what I need to get me all steamed up and pro/anti something or other.

The people who wrote the blogs that I have laughed, smiled, cried, cheered, baked, cursed and stretched my way through today are the ones to which I wish to say thank you.

Thank – you bloggers on wordpress.com for the emotional workout you have given me today. You have put the tick tock back in my heart.

Squash my heart…

Okay so yesterday morning at 2am I get woken up by a tearing feeling in my chest and believe me when I say I thought I was a gone-r for sure.

Every time I tried to move to reach my phone to call for help or even breathe the pain intensified, so I lay there taking tiny little breaths watching the time tick by and wondering as to how long before the pain or I was going to cease.

After about 20 minutes I managed to reach for my phone and lay there with it in my hand.

I had a million things going through my mind, firstly was that I needed to call for help, secondly was how does help get it if everything locked up and thirdly was what good does help do if I have no medical and cannot afford the treatment required for heart attacks?

So I lay their thinking plan B; I sent my kids a message saying, “good morning, I love you.”

I remember looking at the clock and thinking ‘ok it’s been over ½ hour and the pain a bit better so I took a deep breath and then tried changing positions and that was when I finally passed out.

I woke up again as normal on a Monday morning at 5.40am with my alarm yelling the rise and shines. Two things came to mind instantly 1. Shut up alarm 2. I made it.

I slowly reached out to silence the alarm and found not a blinding pain but rather a bruised feeling on the chest area, as though I’d been kicked by a horse. I got up and ever so slowly went about my daily routine.

Off to work I go and eventually decide to go to a states hospital for a check-up.

After extensive tests they have informed me that luckily there is no damage done to the heart but that I have an inflammation in the chest cavity which has swollen and is causing pressure on the heart. Not too serious but if pain not gone by today then report back. Well I am feeling a damn side better today and have a whole new outlook on life.

My heart kicked my ass and made me realize that there is a lot of things that I should have had in order. I have been given a warning in the most painful way I can imagine and I have taken care to listen, I got medical aid, I got a hospital plan, I am taking the meds and I am letting all my family and friends know why they mean the world to me.

Happy place , h a p p y p l a c e . . .

Oh my goodness, if this morning hasn’t been the longest week ever…

I got to work this morning after a nice long and peaceful weekend of doing nothing but lying in/on my bed watching movies and — all hell broke loose.

My manager has decided to launch the new pricing on our software which is great, and what I been suggesting all along, what isn’t great however is the commotion that it has caused in the office. Everyone has an opinion- everyone wants help…

So I go looking for my happy place — the weekend — the movies:

AVATAR – aaah yeah look the wonderful scenery and the lovely peaceful world, the beautiful sky with all its pretty moons – AAAAAAAAArgh look at the size of that thing – and now it’s after me….

FFWD TO NEXT MOVIE

KUNG FU PANDA 2 – sweet little cartoons all on my side now, I’m just a big lovable bear and I can save the world. Say what?? I am adopted??? Okay I’m out of here – cannot handle the emotional stress…

FFWD TO NEXT MOVIE

THE REBOUND – I’m to blame here for leaving the hunky young guy, I blame it on the emotional stress of being adopted and not finding out until now…

FFWD TO NEXT MOVIE

CRAZY ON THE OUTSIDE – mmmm I the oh so evil ex con now falls in love with my parole officer… and now the distrust… NO THANX

FFWD TO NEXT MOVIE

HOUSE BROKEN – PROBLEMS

FFWD TO NEXT MOVIE

GREEN LATERN – PROBLEMS

FFWD TO NEXT MOVIE

HOT CHICK, lightening thief, karate kid, butterfly effect, date movie, how to train your dragon, she’s out of my league, bad boys 2 – PROBLEMS, PROBLEMS AND MORE PROBLEMS

OH DAMMIT – no matter which I try going to, to find my happy place, I find problems, I guess there is no happy place unless you play to the end… so back to work – back to reality!! Got to reach the end…

Nasty Lasty…

Pumba from the Lion King was standing by the side of the road, crying his eyes out as his friend Timone had just been run over …..


The cops arrive and take one look at the bloody mess and ask “What the f*ck happened here ??”

Tearfully Pumba looked up and said ……………..”a coon in a Tata

Take the ride…

Yesterday was a day to get to know the people who live closest to me and I must say I was pleasantly surprised to find that they really are as nice as I thought them to be. My daughter had all of us giggling and laughing as we remembered how fun youthful games are.

There we were – ranging from 11-58 years of age, taking turns to climb in a box and slide down the steep embankment, with a yea-ha and a whoooooo.

Obviously this was great fun, especially after the first nerve wrecking slide each, but after you have had a few drinks and have done this 4-5 times, that embankment becomes ultra steep and pretty difficult to climb.

Try picturing any 40+ adult, fairly tipsy at this point in time, with a glass in one hand, and a box in the other laughing uncontrollably while trying to get up a 45 degree neatly trimmed embankment.

One by one we all dropped out in search of our breath. I am amazed at how great it felt to throw caution to the wind and simply take the ride.

To all of you – the challenge is on – find a box, take a child and climb that embankment. Go on – take the ride!!!

Nashua Mobile sent me a bill of R 120 000 for a R39 data contract in one month

This is a very interesting blog I found that I think might be worth following.

http://www.SCREWME.co.za

Go have a look and let’s see what happens….

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